You said you love me. You said you needed me most. You said I was your happiness. You said I was your reason and motivation.
But, to be honest...You don't love me. You don't need me. You don't need me to be happy. You don't me as your reason and motivation.
You love yourself. You need your education and honor. I'm not your happiness, reason, and motivation. If I was, you wouldn't choose your college over me. Ironic that you said I was needed most because I was your happiness, reason, and motivation for your education at that college. However, you can't choose me over your college. You don't love me. You don't know what it is to love someone. Love is about sacrificing yourself for the one you love. You love yourself. You sacrificed me over your college.
Why do I always have to be the one to sacrifice and adjust because of your mom, nephew, school, work, and sleep? I don't have to do it for you. However, I choose to because I miss you, I want you, and I love you. You even have to gut to tell me to overlook it. I told you many times before that your college is going to be one big problem in our relationship. You neglect it and selfishly tell me to not let it be a problem. Fine. I did neglect it till now. It's been a semester. I've had enough. It's not working out anymore. I have to spend all my free time with you because of the fact that we go to different schools. It's unhealthy for us. I need time for myself, family, friends, and homework. You too right? If we did go to the same college, things will be better for us. We can see each other most of the time. We can have lunch together. We can do homework together. We can motivate each other. We can have breaks and classes together. We can go home early together. We can have alone time in weekends and when we're home. No more hassle of transportation. No more missing each other. No more worrying if we don't spend enough time together. No more need of clingy-ness. No more dozing in class. This is why I want this. It's healthy for us.
But then you suggest that I do less for you. Then what's the point of a relationship? If I do neglect you and do what's best for me, you'll be the sad one. I'll spend all my non-school time doing homework, studying, family, and friends. Even so, I can't. You already made me fall for you. I'm intoxicated. I lost my priorities. You are my priority.
The fact that I want someone in my college and that you're in different college will never change. I don't want this to end but honestly it's best for it to end. I'm sorry.
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